Boring Sunday

It's another boring Sunday, why is it boring you ask? Because it's 8am and I'm awake. I've become one of those boring, old people that wakes up early in the morning on the weekends because they just get so used to it from their boring 9-5 job during the week.

It's been 9 months 3 days since my last life stopped and I rejoined my Canadian life (albeit an even more boring version). I miss my old life, I miss the parts of seeing friends whenever, wherever. I think mostly I just hate living at home again and am itching to get out as quickly as possible. Although it seems to be a possibility in about 2.5 months that time cannot pass quickly enough.

Maybe Canadian life won't be as boring, once I'm living in the Downtown core and am living with the love of my life Lee. Between the boringness of it all and the anxiety of waiting for time to pass so that July arrives and Lee can move over is slowly killing me inside. I've never felt time crawl by slower than it is right now. I have months of this waiting left and it's so unbearable sometimes.

One way we've tried to stave the 'waiting' feeling is by talking constantly. When I mean constantly, I mean constantly. We talk on the phone about 1-2 hours a day (workday), Skype for an average of 1 hour in the evening once I've gotten home from work, in addition to the constant texting and emails that are sent and received during the day as well. I have a monthly 250 international text limit with Rogers Wireless and I easily use it all. He has to pay (I think) £0.14 per international text and easily racks up an additionaal £20 on his monthly plan. Is this not enough you say? In addition to weekday chatting (not including if there is a stat holiday in the mix) then on the weekends we speak for an average of 8 hours a day if possible. However, all this conversing just ends up irritating both of us because all we CAN do is talk/webcam and it points out how much longer we have to wait.

This 4-month stint is much worse than when we didn't see each other from Oct 1 to Jan 29. Essentially 4 months. This time it will be from Feb 23 to July 3. This time it is closer to 4.5 months.

My advice to anybody out there debating whether or not their relationship will be able to attest the trials and tribulations of a long distance relationship:

THINK long and hard about where you see the relationship going. Literally, as far in the future as you can, if you do not believe that this person could be the one for you, honestly, don't bother. The work, effort, money that goes into a long distance relationship is so very draining that if both parties don't have the connection or bond that is necessary to sustain the relationship over great distances and for extended periods of time, then the relationship just won't last. It's sad, but I've heard many a story where it DOESN'T end all pretty with roses. Not that I am unhappy in mine (well in a sense) but its more of a "I wouldn't wish this upon my worst enemy" kind of feeling. To know there is someone you love out there that you can't see whenever you would want to, it is heart wretchingly painful. I would never give up on the relationship I am in now, but I just wouldn't want anyone else to ever have to experience a feeling like this either. If you are being faced with a long distance relationship, really review what can be done to avoid it, exhaust ALL other avenues before choosing this one. It's no picnic.